An open letter to the pediatrician's office

To whichever asshat reads this:

We've had issues before. I call - You put me on hold - I wait. Btw, if you're going to put me on hold for 10 minutes, perhaps it would make sense to have a snippet of music that is a little longer than 26 seconds. I can't even make an appointment without talking to a nurse, yet you insist on a non-nuse answering the phone. This, I have learned to deal with. I'm not happy with it by any means, but dealing.

My daughter has had umpteen million ear infections. Enough in fact, that I have my very own otoscope. I know the signs. I know what they look like. I have a refillable prescription for ear drops. So when I call you up and tell you that her tube is possibly missing from her left ear, that she has had a consistant fever, that she complains that her ear hurts, that a nurse looked at her ear and says it's inflamed, that I have been in twice in the past month because she has had a nasty cold/bronchitis, I kinda expect you to do something about it. She's out of town, so I can't bring her in. I need an antibiotic most likely, but I understand you might not want to do that over the phone. So, what I'm asking for, at the very least, is a referrel to the ENT. I'd be happy with a referral AND a prescription, but I understand.

What I refuse to deal with is your refusal to actually do anything with the information that my child is sick once I do get someone on the phone. So when you just tell me to go the the ER, it kinda pisses me off. You want me to spend $200 and an hour of our day to get a prescription that you're too much of an asshat to prescribe yourself without seeing us? You dismiss the last 2 years of ear infection-inspired experience we've had as worthless and refuse to prescribe based on the obvious symptoms. There is no reason for us to come into your office, excepting that you want to collect your stupid insurance payment and my $15. I need to see the ENT about replacing the tube. You have nothing to do with it further than the referral.

I was pissed off this weekend when you refused to give me a referral. Instead you told me that we could address that on Monday. You are very lucky that you didn't give me the runaround today when I called with my ENT appointment details and gave the referral (finally). However, next time I see you in person, I will have a few things to say.

Katie

tornados

If any of you people reading have stalkerish tendencies, I'll share a little something with you. Rob is absolutely garaunteed NOT to be home during tornados in our area. There have been 3 or 4 times in the last 3 or 4 months when the sirens have gone off and every single one of them, he's been at the ambulance service. Last week we had one, and it was the only day in the past 3 weeks that he worked for the ambulance. He's back to part time after getting the day job. I tell you this - it's a pain in the ass to round up both kids and the radio and flashlights and stuff by yourself and especially when the little one wants to eat.

So anyway - if you're planning on coming over to stalk us and stuff, come when there's a tornado in the area. (But be warned that I have a gun)

playdates

I sent home a note last week inviting all of Ally's classmates over to play with her on Saturday. I did the same last year, and 3 kids came over. This year only 1 did. I really would like for Ally to have some friends she can play at home with sometime. She enjoys her toys so much more when there is someone else to play with. It makes me very sad. Hopefully when Anya gets older they can play together, but what do I do until then. I don't know anyone who has kids her age, and don't know of any playgroups. That idea makes me cringe anyway. I'm just not that outgoing - and have trouble making friends because of it. That's one of the main reasons I'd like for Ally to have kids around. I don't want her to be a social outcast like I often feel. At least not until she becomes a teenager and it's "cool". Do you think I should try again?

Birthday celebration

For the last 4 years, I have not expected anything for my birthday, nor have I done anythong for Rob's. Basically we just treat them as another day. However, we haven't gone out much lately, so Rob decided to use my birthday as an excuse to go out. So Friday night, we spent 6 hours without kids. 6!!! He surprised me. He got one of my firends to come over after work and babysit. He wouldn't tell me where we were going, but just to dress nice, but not real fancy. I got to wear a beautiful dress that another friend had grown out of, and gave to me, but I had never worn before because we never go anywhere. He got all cleaned up and we went out. (Oh, and he even stopped on the way home and bought me a cake. I LOVE cake!!)

We wandered around the mall for a little while, waiting until it was reservation time. I bought some shoes and swimsuits that were on clearance (and he didn't even complain about shopping). We bought tickets to a 10:10 movie, and then went to dinner. The food was great - although I didn't eat a whole lot since I had stuffed myself sick at lunch. I wish he had warned me - although it was nice to be surprised. Then we had some more time to kill, so we went to Barnes and Noble. It was so relaxing. We grabbed some magazines and sat at a table in the peace and quiet. We talked off and on, but mostly spent about an hour in peace and quiet. Did I mention the peace and quiet part yet? 

Then, we went to see Clerks2. Yeah, it's not exactly a date movie, but we aren't exactly dating either, right? We both love Clerks and some of Kevin Smith's other movies were good. Clerks2 was freaking funny! I was prepared to be disappointed because Clerks was great, but the sequal was at least as funny as the first one.

Some of the high-lights:

• Jay and Slient Bob return
• dance routine featuring the song to which Selma Hyack danced in Dogma (too lazy to look it up)
• racial slurs with appearance by Wanda Sykes
• inter-species erotica (beastiality)
• jail time

Very funny.

Plus, did I mention that we got an hour of peace and quiet? It was even worth not getting to bed until 1 am

This is a meme that a lot of people have been doing. Thought I'd jump on the bandwagon  Very cool to see what other folks have done and not!  

 

Bold the ones you've done.  Comments are in italics.

 

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink

02. Swam with wild dolphins

03. Climbed a mountain

04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive

05. Been inside the Great Pyramid

06. Held a tarantula

07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone

08. Said 'I love you' and meant it

09. Hugged a tree 

10. Bungee jumped

11. Visited Paris

12. Watched a lightning storm at sea

13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise

14. Seen the Northern Lights

15. Gone to a huge sports game  (Does Major League Baseball count?)

16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa

17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables

18. Touched an iceberg

19. Slept under the stars20. Changed a baby's diaper

21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon

22. Watched a meteor shower

23. Gotten drunk on champagne  (Yuck)

24. Given more than you can afford to charity

25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope 

26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment 27. Had a food fight

28. Bet on a winning horse

29. Asked out a stranger

30. Had a snowball fight

31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can 32. Held a lamb

33. Seen a total eclipse  (I think so. I have a vague memory of being in grade school with these little cardboard box thingys)

34. Ridden a roller coaster

35. Hit a home run (I am so NOT athletic)

36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking

37. Adopted an accent for an entire day 

38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment39. Had two hard drives for your computer

40. Visited all 50 states

41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced 42. Had amazing friends

43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country

44. Watched wild whales

45. Stolen a sign (Once my friends and I went around town stealing most of the signs under the no Parking signs that said “Any Time”. Hey, we were in high school. It was fun at the time)

46. Backpacked in Europe

47. Taken a road-trip

48. Gone rock climbing

49. Midnight walk on the beach

50. Gone sky diving

51. Visited Ireland

52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love

53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them

54. Visited Japan

55. Milked a cow (felt like a cow milking myself)

56. Alphabetized your cds 57. Pretended to be a superhero 58. Sung karaoke 59. Lounged around in bed all day

60. Posed nude in front of strangers (Well, played cards at least. uh, Mom – forget you saw this. Please don’t ask.)

61. Gone scuba diving

62. Kissed in the rain63. Played in the mud64. Played in the rain65. Gone to a drive-in theater

66. Visited the Great Wall of China

67. Started a business

68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken

69. Toured ancient sites

70. Taken a martial arts class

71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight 

72. Gotten married

73. Been in a movie

74. Crashed a party

75. Gotten divorced

76. Gone without food for 5 days (I’m not sure I’ve ever made it 5 hours. I love to eat)

77. Made cookies from scratch

78. Won first prize in a costume contest.

79. Ridden a gondola in Venice

80. Gotten a tattoo

81. Rafted the Snake River

82. Been on television news programs as an "expert".

83. Got flowers for no reason84. Performed on stage (I burped on command for a talent show once. Proud times!)

85. Been to Las Vegas

86. Recorded music

87. Eaten shark 

88. Had a one-night stand

89. Gone to Thailand

90. Bought a house

91. Been in a combat zone

92. Buried one/both of your parents

93. Been on a cruise ship

94. Spoken more than one language fluently

95. Performed in Rocky Horror.

96. Raised children 

97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour

98. Created and named your own constellation of stars

99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country

100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over (Sort of. That’s what I tried to do In Norfolk VA, but it didn’t actually turn out that way)

101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge 

102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking

103. Had plastic surgery

104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived.

105. Wrote articles for a large publication

106. Lost over 100 pounds

107. Held someone while they were having a flashback

108. Piloted an airplane

109. Petted a stingray

110. Broken someone's heart

111. Helped an animal give birth

112. Won money on a T.V. game show

113. Broken a bone.

114. Gone on an African photo safari

115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced

116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild118. Ridden a horse119. Had major surgery

120. Had a snake as a pet

121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon

122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours (seems likely, although I can’t remember when)

123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states

124. Visited all 7 continents

125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days 

126. Eaten kangaroo meat

127. Eaten sushi

128. Had your picture in the newspaper 

129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about

130. Gone back to school

131. Parasailed

132. Petted a cockroach

133. Eaten fried green tomatoes

134. Read The Iliad and the Odyssey135. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school and read

136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (Every year when we were little, we killed and prepared about 50 chickens. I don’t think I ever killed them myself, but cleaning them? check. I did kill fish, and helped my step-dad kill our pet rabbits. Yummy.)  

137. Skipped all your school reunions (Does it count if you weren’t actually invited?)

138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language  (Do your infants count?)

139. Been elected to public office

140. Written your own computer language

141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream 

142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care

143. Built your own PC from parts

144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you 

145. Had a booth at a street fair

146: Dyed your hair

147: Been a DJ

148: Shaved your head

149: Caused a car accident

150: Saved someone's life

Confession time

Anya is 3 months old today. She is very happy. She smiles and coos, and has long entertaining conversations with anyone who looks her way. If you happen to catch her by surprise (like if the day care lady gives her to you, but she's too busy looking at the spot on the wall to notice when you start talking to her and hug her and then give up and put her in her carseat where she finally notices you exist, for example) she yells in delight. She's a squinty smiler, so when I try to take her pictures she sometimes looks like someone just punched her in the right (edited to add: Oops. That's her left. my right. Did I ever tell you guys that I don't know my right from my left?) eye. She sleeps relatively well, and nurses just fine. She loves her bath and would sit in it for hours if I had the patience to continually squeeze warm water over her body and feet. She loves to see Ally blow raspberries at her. She drools all over everything. I love her so much. She's my little munchkin and Ally's little pumpkin.

But, I have a confession to make. I didn't like her too much when to start with.

I wanted to have a second child. We talked and planned about when would be a good time. We both thought 2 and a half to three years spacing would be ideal. I was overjoyed when I got pregnant. But the pregnancy was so hard. I constantly felt tired and wasn't able to do anything about it. I felt too guilty about Ally. I felt like I was short-changing her by having another kid. I wanted to do everything - be everything for her for the little time we had left. And then I'd get worn down. Those days, I'd sit Ally down in front of a Dora tape and just doze on the couch. I felt bad for not being there for her, and I took it out on Rob. Because if I couldn't be there for her, I expected him to be. But he still worked 24 hour shifts and went to school full time and wasn't really a part of our daily routine anyway. I (and circumstances) made it impossible for him to take over, but resented him for not doing it anyway.

When I finally got to feeling like I couldn't take it anymore, I started seeing a counselor for the stress. It helped being able to talk about it. But, it didn't really change anything. It was everything going on around me that stressed me out. Those things couldn't really be changed. I just needed to be able to deal with it better, and the hormones were making it hard to do. I quit going and just decided to hold on as long as I could. Rob finished school in May, and Anya came in April.

But, when Anya came it was so different than I had imagined. Rob and I got along much better, but our lives changed in so many different ways than I had planned on.

First of all, I was worried about Ally's feelings. I had to have a c-section, and any of you who read back then already know what a hard decision that was for me. I was so worried about how it would affect Ally. How she would feel about not being able to climb on me and me not being able to pick her up. Whether she would feel abandoned when I had to stay at the hospital. Whether she would act out in frustration and what I could do about it if I coudn't pick her up or really do anything except talk to her. What if she just ran away from me? I couldn't run after her. Would she mind if we set up her crib for Anya?

It turns out that none of those things were really a problem. We explained that mommy's belly hurt, and Ally couldn't hurt me. We had to do it often, but she accepted it without much question. She sat on my lap instead of me holding her. She loved coming to visit at the hospital because she got to ride the elevators. (I actually felt more abandoned than she did, I think. Everyone was trying to help with Ally, and I got to feeling a little left out.) Ally wasn't really interested in me or the baby a whole lot at the time. She did have a few "trying" moments. She was testing if her boundries had changed, and most of the time I was able to show her they hadn't. There were rough times when she knew I couldn't do anything because I was feeding Anya, but once we explained to Darra how we wanted it handled, she and Rob handled it. She hasn't even noticed that her crib is set back up. She just doesn't care that much.

(I just re-read the above paragraph and it doesn't exactly give the right impression. She does care. Anya has seriously disrupted her life. We had many screaming fits and tantrums thrown. But she has also adapted a little. She still has days that she is pressing my buttons for the sole reason that she wants to be the center of attention instead of the baby, but they aren't as often. Kids are adaptable.)

I thought about day care and bottles and carseats and clothes for Anya, and all the other parts of running around with a baby again. I figured I'd be tired, and I figured that it would be okay anyway. After all, I've done this before, right? It can't be so different.

The real problem was that I had forgotten how hard it is. Having a newborn sucks ass most of the time. The only redeeming quality is that the few redeeming moments are SO good that they overshadow the far more prevalent crappy ones. But, with Ally, I could nap when she did. I could lay down on the floor and talk to her. I could sit her on the couch and watch tv over her head - I could get a little break occasionally. I didn't have to be constantly explaining things or disciplining or planning meals or doing as much laundry or any one of the other 500 things that I am already doing with Ally. It takes a lot of time and energy away from me and away from my interactions with Anya. I feel so guilty sometimes that Anya doesn't get the attention that Ally did. Guilty that Anya gets attention intstead of Ally. Guilty that Ally gets attention instead of Anya. Even guilty when I interact with both of them at the same time. It's imposible.

Plus, Anya started out as a monster. She screamed all the time. From about 5 in the evening to about 9 at night, someone had to be constantly attending to her. She wouldn't lay down. She ate every 2-3 hours, and would wake up in between feedings screaming when she had to poop. When she woke up, we'd look at the clock to figure out whether she woke because she was hungry or pooping (Rob would ask me "Is she hungry, or is this the 90 minute poop?"). Plus, she'd scream for an hour if she had 5 drops of pee in her diaper. I can't even count the number of diapers we'd use per day. She was very high maintenance. Since I sent Ally to day care in the daytime to give Anya and I some guilt-free time (and to keep Ally's schedule un-interupted and keep me sane) it seemed like I never got to spend any time with her. Anya interupted everything we did - even our bedtime stories sometimes. It made Ally very cranky, and me very cranky. Rob couldn't take it. He has a central-auditory-processing-something that makes it hard for him to distinguish sounds and has a constant ear infection on top of that. Ally and I were grumpy and Anya screamed all the time. He tried to help, but he got very cranky too.

If she ever did stop crying, I'd usually set her down. I'm sure that didn't help. But, holding her and trying to get her to stop for hours at a time was just too much. Ally was suffering, my head was suffering, my back was suffering, and also, my personal hygeniene was suffering occasionally. So every chance she gave me, I walked away. I rationalize all this by saying that Anya won't remember it later anyway (of course by writing about it, she won't have to remember - she can just read it) I didn't like her. I loved her so much it occasionally left me speechless, but most of the time, that love was hidden behind the angry lady in my head yelling "Why won't she just shut up for a little while?".

Rob and I think she was a little too early. They did the c-section a week ahead of my due date, but I just think it was too soon. Her digestive system needed some more time. She didn't smile as soon as Ally. She was late looking around and focusing on things. (Although her size has always been at tthe top of the charts. Just look at those cheeks!)

About 6 or 8 weeks old, Anya finally started to settle down a bit. She turned from a monster into a baby. She started smiling, she started sleeping (a little better than Ally did I think), she started paying attention to things. She started to pay attention to people. Ally and I play games making faces at Anya to see who can make her laugh so hard she gets hiccups. Ally sits on my lap and holds her. She gets very posessive at day care when any of her friends want to touch Anya. Anya stares over my sholder at anyone walks by. I love tickling her multiple chins. I am so glad that she's 3 months old.

dunna, dunna, da, da, da, DA

What, you didn't recognize that tune from my singing?

It's my birthday. Yippee! I'm 28. People keep asking me how old I am and I don't remember. I have to do the math every time. I went to lunch at Olive Garden today, and stuffed myself WAY too much! am very sorry about that now. Wow. belly hurts.

There's this guy that I dated in high school for a short time. We also went to the same church, and knew each other's families and stuff. His dad helped me train my horse for the 4-H fair shows and stuff. He was a grade ahead of me, and his sister was a grade below. She even lived on the same floor as me one year at college. Anyway, if I could have possibly married the family without marrying the guy (who I do love, but just not enough to marry) I would have. If I could adopt new parents, they'd be my first choice. if I didn't love my in-laws, I'd say I wished Rob was their kid, but... Anyway, I got a card in the mail from both the sister (Thanks Jill) the mom (Thanks Harriett) and a phone call from the guy. I love that family!!

Lat time, I swear

i repeat - my doctor is an idiot.

You know that Keflex that he couldn't prescribe for me? It's what I'm currently taking. Yeah, it's safe.

Here's a brief recap.

He wanted to prescribe Keflex.

I told him I was nursing - asked if that was okay.

He told me no - prescribed something else.

Pharmacy said it wasn't safe.

Called the dr office to get it fixed.

Dr called in Keflex - confused me.

I called both pediatrician and ob/gyn for doublecheck.

Am now taking Keflex.

Idiot!

feet

check out the latest scrapbook page located here:

http://ktjrdn.photosite.com/scrapbook2006/

death wish

Yesterday, Ally had a death wish. She woke up whining and didn't stop (unless she was screaming or crying) for a couple hours. Rob and I both lost our patience, and I about threw her out the window. (not really, but I was close) She improved throughout the day.

We went to the fairgrounds and saw the horse a friend of Rob's shows, and them went on some rides (they have them open all summer on the weekends) When we were on our way home, we told Ally that it was almost time for a nap, and put her in bed when we got home.

For the past 2 years, Ally has fought us at naptime. We usuallly put her in the car and drive somewhere and avoid the fight (yeah, we're horrible parents, blah blah) It's only 2 days a week, and she naps well at day care. But 2 or 3 weeks ago, we tried to get her to lay down on her own, cause she was being a brat and clearly needed a nap, but the car ride didn't work. She pitched a fit and screamed a while, but them she lay down. Now, she naps. For 2 or 3 weekends, she has laid (I know that's horrible english, but don't really care) down with little or no fuss. Today, she didn't even try to argue with me.

It makes me SOO mad. I love it that she naps, but I just want to wring her neck that she couldn't have figured this out long ago. I know it's our fault, but I still want to wring her neck. It could have been this easy all along! Same thing with sleeping through the night. She has only really started that now that Anya is here. and while I was home on maternity leave, she all of a sudden, on her own, decided that it would be okay to lean her head back when I was her hair instead of screaming at me, looking down, and getting water in her eyes. I've been trying to get her to do that forever too.

I know this is the terrible twos, and expected her to annoy me, but not by being cooperative.

back to the sickness once more
My dr is an idiot. He was going to write me a prescription for Keflex, and I said "Can I take that while I'm nursing?" Of course not, so he scrolled through his little palm pilot thingy and found something else. i dropped it off with Walgreens, and went back to pick it up. I know my dr is an idiot, so I asked the pharmacist if it was safe. It's not. So now, I'm waiting to see if he replaced it with something that actually is safe. Bastard.

That'll teach me

Once upon a time, we had 2 cats. I loved them dearly, and Rob tolerated them. Now, one of the cats got an idea in his head that he wanted to play outside all the time. We couldn't have him prowling the neighborhood, so we came up with this idea to keep them in the yard like a dog. We put a dog door in our screen door to the backyard, and strung a wire around the top of our fence. Then we put shock collars on the cats. Of course, the cats are smaller than most dogs, so we didn't know how high to set the voltage. We didn't want to hurt them. So to test it, Rob stood next to the fence and touched the shock prongs. He got shocked, of course. He cussed and dropped the collar and shook his hand, and turned the voltage down a little. And the next time he walked near the fence, he made damn sure he wasn't touching the prongs. In fact, the next time I walked near the fence I looked down at my hands to make sure I wasn't even carrying the collar. (Who am I kidding? The next twenty times I went near the fence I did the same thing) Electric shock (i.e. PAIN) is an excellent teacher of some lessons - even secondhand.  (Unfortunately, it only worked on the cats for about a month and a half. The cat decided he was more interested in the field across from the house than staying out of pain, so he jumped the fence anyway - and brought many many dead animals and some live ones back with him, so we had to relocate the cats to a friend's house in the country.)

Until about a month ago, that was the only lesson PAIN had ever taught me.

Last night, Anya ate at around 5:15 and stayed awake with Rob afterward looking around at stuff outside. She didn't fall asleep until around 7 or so, which is not unusual. Ally's bedtime did not go well last night (for Rob and I - Ally did just fine) so I was in no mood to stay up longer by waking Anya up to eat. I figured, I would just go to sleep and see how long it took. The next time I looked at my watch, it was 4:00. I rolled over and instantly my boobs hurt.

Last month I had mastitis. I woke up and my right boob hurt, and I felt like shit. Then I got a fever, and it just got worse from there. That was the crappiest I've ever felt, I think. My fever topped at 102.5 thankfully, cause Rob was going to make me go to the hospital if it didn't come down soon. He had to come home from work and help with the kids and help me function. Again - it sucked.

Anyway... This morning, I almost panicked. My boobs hurt and I was hot. I jumped off the couch (where I was sleeping 'cause Anya was asleep upstairs, and I wouldn't be able to hear her in bed unless she was screaming loud enough to wake Ally up too, and no one wants that) freaking out. I frantically felt myself up and concluded that I was just full, and I cannot even express the relief I felt. I was hot because the upstairs is always warmer than my bedroom. But just for that one nstant, I felt like I was walking toward the fence again.

11 hours of sleep. I don't think Ally has ever done that when she hasn't been sick. (Has Ally ever NOT been sick? I can't seem to remember) So now, I worry about Anya sleeping too much. Of course, not too much, 'cause I'm kinda self-centered and have half my brain cheering because there is hope that someday I will sleep again. I had long ago given up on that. She's probably just going through a growth spurt or something.

in other non-sickness related news...
I was on the phone with the technical assitance people for one of Ally's toys that wouldn't work the other day. Of course, Ally wouldn't be quiet, and then Anya woke up and started fussing. So, I had a brilliant thought and got them both to leave me a lone. I told Ally to "go make faces at your sister" So she went over to Anya and blew raspberries at her for a while and kept them both out of my hair. She's such a good kid. I'm really enjoying this whole "follows simple instructions" phase Ally is going through. (Of course, she only follows the ones she decides she wants to, but hey, she's 2. and she's female, so I'm not sure that will ever change)

sickness
I stayed home yesterday. Everybody but Rob is sick in varying degrees. I had to suck Anya's nose out lots and lots in the middle of the night the other day. 2 month olds aren't supposed to have big green buggers are they? Ally got cough medicine last time we went to the dr a couple weeks ago, but is not getting much better. In fact, her nose started running too. My cough is not getting any better, and I can't take a lot of medicine for fear of drying up my milk. Now, I too have a runny nose. I had to sleep on the cough Tuesday night so I could sleep sitting upright.

So yesterday, I took Ally back to the Dr and found out she now has a sinus infection, and FINALLY we got some antibiotics for her. Hopefully she'll be better soon. I have an appointment with my dr this afternoon. Maybe I can get some antibiotics too. Anya is pretty much okay. She doesn't have much sinus cavity yet to get infected or anything. I just have to keep her nose sucked out and maybe spray it with some saline to keep it clear. But, my god, will it ever end???

Rob is kinda pissy because he's afraid he's going to get sick. and he's sick of hearing all of us "cough and hack" all thetime. It gives him a headache. What about me? Doing it kinda gives me a headache too. Men!!

And the crappy thing is that some stupid kid somewhere decided to eat one of those Triaminic vapor patches, and so they got recalled. They worked so well at helping Ally sleep at night when she's congested. Now, even if you see them on the shelf and get excited and try to buy every last one of them, thrilled that you found them just in time, the cashier will dash your hopes and won't be able to ring them in even if you beg her "Please, please, they are the only thing that works", because the computer tells her they've been recalled and she probably tells all her co-workers and they all laugh at your desperation after you leave. Fuckers.

heaven is quiet
I got to ride to work all by myself today. I work 3 blocks from my daughters' day care (well, Ally's - Anya doesn't get to go there for another month and a half), so I was always the one to drop the kids off in the morning. I'd get the whole "Since you're going to be going right past there..." Nevermind the fact that I had to be at work at 7:00 and he didn't have to be anywhere for the whole day, and could do it without rushing around, etc. Anyway... I have to leave even earlier now that I have to take Anya to day care at a whole other place. Ally needs to sleep more and Rob has to work in the same building as me and is up anyway and doesn't have to work until 8:00. He's now taking the kids to work and I'm picking them up after. I got to ride to work today in complete silence. It was great!

I was only a little embarrassed when I drove to the daycare anyway and had to make a big u-turn. :)

thumbsucking
I don't even know where to start. I hate seeing kids with pacifiers when they are old enough to talk. I know that you can take them away before that, but most parents just don't for some reason or another. I still don't think a pacifier is a good thing. I think kids should be comforted by their parents, or a boob, or something. But NOT their thumbs either.

I am not judging anyone whose child sucks something. Whatever works for whoever is working it, ya know? I am just very grateful it never became an issue at our house. Ally never even tried to suck anything else. I hate to admit it, but I even tried to get her to suck a pacifier once (just once, I promised myself I would never give it to her again), just to get her to shut up (please God - shut UP!!) - no dice.

I hate thumbsucking. I can't even verbalize why. It's beyond words. Maybe it makes me feel like I'm failing or something, and it's too emotional for me to admit it. Maybe it's just because I've seen how hard it is to break the habit. Unlike a pacifier, you can't really take a thumb away. Maybe something I can't remember from my childhood is influencing it (I sucked my thumb, but Mom asid I quit pretty much without a fight) Whatever it is, the very thought just makes me shudder. I would rather give my kids a pacifier.

Rob hates pacifiers the way I hate thumbs. He says you shouldn't give a kid an external blah, blah, blah. I don't know his argument that well, because my mind was screaming NOT-THE-THUMB the whole time he was talking. Whatever. It makes sense logically. I just can't convince myself of it completely.

Anya has found her thumb. I've taken it away from her and rocked/bounced her in the past, but she didn't have a whole lot of coordination then. I just hoped it would go away. But now, she's getting pretty good at directing it to her mouth when she's fussy. Rob is not happy with it either, and we both just hoped it would pass, but it doesn't look like it's going to. I hate it. Everyone keeps telling me that "some babies just need to suck". That sounds like BS to me.

So how about it? Can anyone help me come to terms with this? Because it looks like I'm going to have to.

more pictures
I've done a couple scrapbook pages, and have Anya's 2 month pictures.

These are the album covers for my photo albums. I have them organized by age.
This is from birth to 1 year old
This one is from 1 to 2 years old

And this is my album for the few pages I've done this year. I'm way behind! One of them is the invite to the BBQ we have every summer.

Also, Anya's 2 month pictures are up. (Well, they will be soon if they aren't right now. I'm going to work on them next.)

random boring thoughts
The other day, I was "eating" Anya's toes. Ally thought it was great. She laughed and laughed (and Anya giggled too). But later, I walked upstairs and found Ally sitting on the couch with her foot in her mouth. Maybe not the greatest thing to teach her.

Rob started his new job Monday. He's already bored. Haha. He always tells me he'd be glad to be bored at work and now he's finding out that it's ... well... boring. Anyway, they are going to start real training next week. This week is just paperwork and training manuals.

I've actualy had work to do. I'm happy for something to do, but there was something wrong with my html and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was causing it. I finally figured out how to fix it, but still don't know why it happened in the first place. Very frustrating.

Anya is a huge fatso. It's starting to be very hard to carry her in the pumpkin seat. But, she's much happier. I really had a hard time liking her to start with. She was a monster. She's settling in and becoming an easier baby. Boy, it's a good thing that I was too exhausted to post much that first month or so. I was not a happy camper.

I can't eat egg rolls. This really upsets me. There is a place in the town where my FIL lives that makes THE BEST egg rolls I've ever eaten. So, when we go visit, Rob and I almost always come home with some. (Like a couple dozen) They are so yummy. Well, we brought some home Sunday. I had one Sunday, and a couple Monday, and Anya turned back into a monster (complete with thumb-sucking, but that's a post in and of itself). I didn't have any Tuesday, and yesterday she turned back into a baby. I think the cabbage is bothering her or something. Boo-hoo. I want egg rolls!

We're having our 4th annual cookout on August 6th this year. I made up these cute little invitations, and had them printed. I made them the right size for some envelopes I had at home. Problem is that they printed them the wrong size and I didn't notice it and told them it was okay. So now I have to buy different envelopes. oh well.

"How did Ally enjoy the fireworks?" you ask. What fireworks? we didn't see any. Now I know that makes us the worst parents on the block, but honestly, it makes our life much easier. See, the thing about fireworks is that you can't see them until it's dark. And it doesn't get dark until after 9. That's Ally's bedtime. Hence, no fireworks. Someday maybe, but not now - sleep is better.

Speaking of sleep: mom took Ally to Jungle of Fun on Monday. She had to drag Ally out kicking and screaming. I guess Ally had a good time. Whaatever - she wore herself out and hasn't been feeling that great. Anyway, she fell asleep on the way home, and didn't wake up until the next morning. Well, she woke up a couple times, but mostly just moved a little and whined a little and went back to sleep. Then the next morning she puked. I think she just got too hot, and was a little sick to start with, then didn't eat for 18 hours or so... Anyway, she felt better and is back to normal now. She has never in her (short) life slept for 13 hours before.

Anyway, that's some fo the random boring things going on in my life. How bout you?

sleep
Anya has been settling in to a sleeping pattern. She usually goes around 4 hours or so at night, so I usually only have to get up once. It's not terrible (anymore). But last night, she ate at 9, went to sleep at 9:20, and didn't wake up until 3:15 am. For those of you who are math-impaired - that's 6!! hours. I'm so happy. I can't remember ever sleeping that long. Of course I didn't go to sleep right way. There's always something to do before bed, but still... there was much rejoicing when I looked at the clock this morning.

Doctor's office
Aly has had a cough for a while. (so of course, I have too) I finally took her to the dr office Friday. Anya had a well-baby check-up and they told me to bring Ally along (and come in half hour early and then they made me sit for 45 minutes). Ally now has some extra strength prescription cough syrup, and Anya was pronounced "very healthy". She now weighs 14 1/2 pounds.

So now both of the children have been seen and I'm still coughing. Yuck.