work
Yes, I'm still pregnant.

Ok, I know most of you are not going to feel sorry for me here. Everyone has a shitty job. I know. Mine is driving me out of my mind though. Before I got this promotion to computers, I was a tax specialist. That basically meant that I spent all day talking to taxpayers, and fixing their screw-ups, and when they couldn't be fixed, telling them to cough up the money or we wouldn't let them sell their house. it was kinda annoying, but it was busy. Then, I decided that I didn't want to do that forever (and it takes forever to get promoted, or to move around or whatever) so I got myself a computer programming job instead.

I don't know anything about computers. The last programming class I had had was in 6th grade in Basic on a Commodore 64 (I think). but, I got myself hired. and a raise upwards of $500 a month. I worked my ass off, and now I know some programming.

BUT No one will give me any work to do!!!!!! Everything right now is tied up in committees. No one will decide what actually needs done, and let us do it. And, I still can't work by myself, because there's a lot of front end stuff that I haven't been introduced to yet (Hello server, my name is Katie). But, I'm going out of my mind here. Seriously. losing brain cells by the day. My work ethic has gone to crap. I used to be GOOD at what I did. I cared. I don't anymore. I don't do anything. And it's getting worse, since they know I'm leaving soon. Here are some of the things I've done in the last weeks:

searched google for a zebra print scrapbook paper and scaled it down for a friend who is volunteering for a dinner theatre for her daughter's swing choir. She's using it for decorations.

modified a JavaScript trivia quiz for my husband who needs it for a semester project for a class he's taking. I originally wrote it about my daughter when I was teaching myself stuff. Now it's for the Beatles. Yes, that's cheating. But so is taking an entire online class for him, and I'm've done that before too.

helped same friend from above with another Paint Shop type of decoration thing she needed.

tried to decide what my birth announcements should look like.

cleaned out my desk

backed up all my digital scrapbook files, and elements to disk, so I can do it from home if I feel like it

played websudoku ad finitum

balanced my checkbook and paid bills.

read countless blogs

googled a bunch of former classmates. I can't find anyone. I came from a small town though. I'm not surprised. We didn't even have computer classes or anything, so I'm not sure they are even on the internet.

I can't even remember. It's all too boring

If it weren't for the money, I'd have to go insane. But, that's pretty good. Sometimes I feel guilty. Most of the time I'm just bored. What are some good things to do while you should be working, that you can do and no one will know your screwing off?

(Okay, so I'm a little late asking for advice seeing as how I'm've only got 2 1/2 work days left, but I'm not expecting it to be any better after I get back either)

P.S. I'm taking some more computer classes in the fall, so I'm can possibly have a chance to transfer out of this job eventually. Anyone know any good COBOL or JCL books I could teach myself with until then?

Posted by ktjrdn at 10:54 CDT

Post Comment | View Comments (2) | Permalink
Commenters' email address will be kept private

anniversary
Yes, I am still pregnant.

Hey, I just noticed the date on this blog. It seems I started it on this site April 15, 2005. It's a year old, and I missed it's birthday. I'm a horrible mother. Happy (late) Birthday Blog!

Middle of April is a very interesting time for me.
2002 - I was getting married (April 13th)
2003 - I was puking. Morning sickness had set in. My first sonogram was April 15th
2004 - Rob and I went out and left Ally for the first time with a babysitter.
2005 - I started this blog here. (I know, it's kinda not a milestone, but go with me on this one)
2006 - I'm having a baby!

Birth Annoucements
Yes, I'm still pregnant.

My friend Jamie is a very crafty person. She stamps, and makes cards, and is starting scrapbooking too I think. Anyway, I'm making her come up with ideas for my baby announcements. I like pictures (haha, like that's a big revelation), so I'm going to put a picture in it, but I want it to look pretty. Last time, I printed it off my computer at home, folded the paper in fourths, and stuck a wallet size pic in. This time they'll be decorated.

The thing that sucks is this: According to the parenting magazine Miss Manners, sending announcements to people who already know you've had the baby is just asking for gifts. I say phooey. I do it so that everyone has a record of height, weight, date, and a picture they can keep. So you're all getting one. In fact, I really only send them to people that already know I had the baby. Otherwise, it really is asking for a gift. I'm going out on a limb here and saying "Screw you Miss Manners!" So, anyway, don't send me presents. (or do, I don't mind. LOL) Do look at how cute Anya is. Cause that's the point. And do look at how pretty the card is. Cause I had help this time.

P.S. Is it pretentious to be talking about birth announcements before the actual birth? I'm just excited, cause Jamie showed me her ideas today. And I've only got 5 days to go anyway...

P.P.S. Anya is probably going to be what I call (I almost wrote baby #2 here, but that just seems wrong - although appropriate for an infant. They're full of #2.) the new baby. I think that her name is going to be Anastasia Corinne. Don't quote me on that. Rob has been waffling for a long time about the middle name. And some of you may remember that I was absolutely convinced that Ally was going to be called Alex until I saw her and changed my mind.

Easter pics
Yes, I'm still pregnant.

These are just the ones I've taken. who knows when I'll get the one I bought scanned in. The scanner is not even currently hooked up. Go to the end of this album ->

I can't guarantee that this link will work in the future, as I move photos around, but for now, the direct link is at https://ktjrdn.tripod.com/ally/index.album?i=68

last night sucked
Yes, I'm still pregnant.

The best thing I can say about last night was that it is over. I never have to go ther again. Ally is still coughing, and has decided that when her cough medicine wears off in the middle of the night, she would rather scream than take more. Rob has decided that it is my fault that I can't make the kid stop screaming. I have decided that I'm going to shave my head and join a cult that believes in selling your children and doesn't believe in marriage.

Plus, Rob spent all evening replaceing the starter in our car. This is the one I was driving last week. We got tires put on the Regal, and so we switched back so he can drive his precious Bonneville. Sometime in the past week, the starter developed issues. Cause it worked when I had it. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. Not such a big deal (they're cheap), but it meant Ally and I spent most of the night alone, like usual. God, I love life.

The mall
Yes, I'm still pregnant.

Friday we took Ally to see the Easter bunny at the mall. I dressed her in a pretty blue dress that used to be Marley's (her cousin). Then, I almost cried. See, Ally had a matching dress (all the cousins did) on her first Easter. When she was . She was a little baby. Now, she's a kid. She calls me "Mom" and has a personality, and is so grown up. The dress just show-cased that. Flashbacks... When we got her changed into normal clothes, the feeling went away a little.

Anyway, she loved the easter bunny. The mom of the kid before us got lots of pictures and a CD made, so we had to wait a while. Ally didn't wait. She went up and sat on the bunny's lap while she waited for her picture to be taken. She smiled real big. the Easter bunny tickled her a little. They got a great picture. I got some decent ones with my camera, but haven't gotten them downloaded yet. Will tell you all when I do, so you can marvel at her beauty-ness.

The trip was all about Ally. She had a blast. She rode a little train too. All by herself. She waved as she went past us. She and Rob rode the merry-go-round. Rob sat her on the horse, but didn't buckle her, so she told him about it and made him do the buckles. Then she made him sit on the horse next to her. She tried to get him to buckle too, but the buckles just aren't big enough. So, if Dad is too big for the buckles, he's too big for the horse, and she made him get down. It was really cute. The whole time they were going round, she was talking to him about something.

I swear she's too old. How am I going to feel next week, seeing her next to little Anya? I don't think I can take it.

still here
No, I haven't gone into labor early. I think that's how I'm going to answer my phone. "Hello - Yes, I'm still huge and not in labor yet, How are you?" I seem to have forgotten how this went last time. I can't really believe that, because it was really annoying last time, but there you have it. It was hidden from memory by the little gnomes in my head. Anyway, when I call anyone in my family, this is how the conversation goes:

"Hello"
"Hey, whatcha doin?"
"Why are you in labor?"
"No"
"oh, what did you want then?"

Or, if I call a cell phone, it doesn't even go that far. They all have caller id. We skip right to the labor question.

Anyway. I'm still pregnant. Am likely to be for another 8 days. Am very large, and very tired, mostly grumpy, and a little sickly (stupid weather). And VERY impatient. I want to hold my little baby with my arms instead of with my ribs.

keys
"I seem to be having tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle" My keys in particular. This morning I managed to lock myself out of my car and Rob had to come back home (he had already left for work and let me in. Then, when I went to Walmart to pick up the tv, I did it again. This time a co-worker was there to help with the tv, and I had to do something I swore I would never do. Rob would KILL me if he found out. I put Ally in the backseat without a car-seat so Darren could drive me to work so I could get my extra keys, so I could get into my car, so I could get into my house, so I could get the tv out of his car without letting Rob know I bought him the TV until he gets home tomorrow. I'm a horrible mother. But all is okay. No one is dead. As long as none of you tell Rob about it. Deal? Deal.

Twice in one day. Duh.

PS. Anyone who can identify that quote (without google) wins a cookie.

4 years
Rob and I have been married for 4 years. WOW. I love him to death. I hate him pretty often too. But this week has been pretty good, and I decided to get him something for our anniversary. Now, we are not present people. I can't be sure, but I don't think either one of us has erally even gotten birthday presents since we've been married. (the year we got back together, I got tons of presents, but that was different. He was sucking up, so he could keep me forever) Now, there are 2 things that I know he'd LOVE to have. Neither one of them is small. I can't buy them myself. Besides being pregnant, I have no way of transporting them home. One is a tv that actually fits the entertainment center hole. The other is a new mattress. Now, the tv would fit in the car if I didn't have a car seat, but when does that ever happen? The mattress - not so much. So, he's getting a tv. But wait, you say... You're 8+ months pregnant, you can't pick up a big heavy tv. I know. So I've conned a couple guys from work to help me out. Rob's working today, and won't he be surprised tomorrow when he gets homeand sees it all wrapped up in a big bow. The best part is that it'll have a new remote. Ours is wrapped in black duct tape to keep the batteries from falling out. Yes, we might be rednecks.



**Yes, I'm feeling a little bit guilty about the dog thing. But mostly, I'm just glad he changed his mind, and love him. If I wasn't 8+ months pregnant, I'd put a bow on myself instead. But that ain't happening.

In which I gloat with no shame...
We don't have a puppy anymore. I'm so happy. Rob is not so much. I can't be demonstratively happy about it at home, so I come here - to the internet - so say this.. Yippee! Yahoo! I'm doing the happy dance, you'll just have to use your imagination.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm an animal person. More of a cat person than a dog person, but I love animals. I think kids deserve to have pets. The only problem is that Ally is not old enough for a puppy. She's not old enough for any animal. THat means the animal is mine (not Rob's, because he's done every 3rd day). I didn't want a puppy. Let me refresh your memory. It seemed like it was going to work out. That was for a couple days. Then all hell broke loose. I had a horrible terrible week. It seemed like everytime I opened my mouth, I was yelling at ALly or the dog, and was constantly picking things up so she wouldn't chew on them. Some of it was my hormones, but some of it was just that having a puppy around (and we found out she was even younger than we had thought) was just adding to my already overwhelming (to me - maybe not anyone else...) stress levels.

Rob and I talked about it, and he convinced me to give it some time, and let him train her a little. I still had many reservations, but agreed. For one thing, the dog chewed on everything! How was I going to have an infant in the house when I couldn't even set her down anywhere but the crib? They need time to play on the floor. They need to be able to have toys around. I need to be able to put her in her swing for f seconds occasionally. Unfortunately, the swing sits on the floor, and I was afraid to put it together because the dog would chew on it. For another, the dog overstimulated Ally. A two year old just can't handle that much attention without going crazy and dragging everyone else with her. At least not in my house.

The other day Rob must have gotten tired of my endless bitching. He was doing the dishes, and the dog was bothering Ally, and I refused to intervene. He got pissed, and decided to give Sandy back to the lady that he got her from. Hallelujah!!

I won! I never win. Rob always logicaly shoots down every one of my arguments. I have no idea what happened, and I don't care. I'm thrilled. Here's a list of things that I no longer have to do:

close the gate to the stairs all the time so Sandy doesn't go downstairs and eat anything

tell Ally to pick up her toys or Sandy will eat them

tell Ally that she can't sit at her picnic table because Sandy can reach her food there and will eat it

look around the room every 5 minutes to see if there's anything that inadvertantly got left on the floor where Sandy could eat it.

spend the first 5 minutes upon returning home to pick up the things that Sandy has destroyed while we were gone.

worry about oh so many things

smell like dog

yell at Ally not to lay on the dog

get the dog off the kitchen table

Here's the damage:

All three of our kitchen chairs (admittadly not family heirlooms or anything like that) have been chewed up.

countless papers that Ally has colored on and left on her desk have been destryoed.

Ally's potty seat has had to be sanded down because the dog chewed on it making it all scratchy.

many of our bushes we bought last year have no wood remaining above ground. Hopefully they will grow back anyway?

the support poles for Ally's play house have been chewed.

One book has had to be replaced, and others have been chewed

Much laundry (mostly socks) has required re-washing. The dog liked to grab it and take it outside to chew on it.

I figure we got off lucky. I wasn't ready for a puppy.

Rob wasn't so thrilled. I have had to be very quiet about my gloating. In fact, I can't really say anything. I get ready to - oh just about anything, but here's one example - go to bed, and I think, "Oh, I don't have to find the remote because Sandy isn't going to eat it" or "Ah, Ally's shoes can stay on the floor. Sandy won't eat them."


PS. I wrote this post once before, but Tripod ate it. It was a lot more gloating, but time has worn away a tiny bit of the victory. But, I WON! No more dog!

Posted by ktjrdn at 10:58 CDT

Post Comment | Permalink
Commenters' email address will be kept private

read this
http://finslippy.typepad.com/finslippy/2006/01/speaking_of_ban.html

Now pretend that I wrote it about Ally. It's so true (Well, except for the chicken nugget part)

help
Can anyone help me remember what I wanted to say here? I started a new entry for a reason, but can't for life of me remember why.

My train of thought seems to have been de-railed. (Stupid pregnancy brain)

potty training
Twice yesterday Ally and I had the same conversation. She said "I want some candy". I tell her she only gets candy if she pees in the potty. I ask if she needs to pee. She says "Yes" and she sits and pees. Then she gets candy. It's actually been working out okay. If I could just get her to say "I need to potty" instead of asking for candy...

leftovers
I threw the last piece of pizza in the microwave for Ally last night, and she threw a fit. She was screaming "I don't want it hot!" So, Rob stopped the microwave and gave the pizza to her. He told her he doesn't like it hot either. It had been warmed up for about 10 seconds. She ate the whole freaking thing (Well, except for about 2 adult bites) and was happy. She also ate a Pop Tart and some strawberry yogurt. How's that for healthy? She didn't eat anything for lunch at day care yesterday again. They're having hot dogs today, so I'm not expecting her to eat today either. Maybe we can get a habit of eating supper started? As long as the day care keeps having things she doesn't like for lunch...

sleeping
Remember how I was just going on and on about how well Ally has been sleeping lately? How she's been going to bed with a minimun of hassle and not waking up until we're ready to leave in the morning? How great Rob and I have felt when we wake up in the morning and realize that we didn't have to drag our butts (haha - my butt) out of bed in the middle of the night to attend to her? How much in a better mood it has left her? What!?! You don't?? Well, that must be because I didn't write about it since I knew it was doomed to stop at any time. That time is here once again.

Ally has developed a snotty nose and cough again. Which means she's not sleeping again. Which means I'm not sleeping again. I've pretty much gotten used to it. It has happened so many times before, but there's a monkey-wrench been thrown into the mix this time. I lay down and go to sleep. I get up at 12:30 to go put her back to sleep. She goes to sleep for 15 minutes, I go to bed, and can't get back to sleep because I have heartburn from getting up and sitting by her bed. Then, I get comfortable. then she wakes up and I have to do it again. Then I feel like puking, because the heartburn is worse. If I go upstairs to get a glass of milk, I wake up the dog, who wakes up Ally. If I don't, I might wake up Ally if I puke since the bathroom is right across the hall from her room. So I just try to get as comfortable as possible on a huge stack of pillows I prop myself up with. Heartburn sucks.

Anyway, I have hope. She has slept before. She will sleep again. I just have given up on expecting it to happen more than a week in a row.

update on the car conversation
It's entirely possible that Aden did throw a ball at Ally. Ally went to a teacher complaining that Aden hurt her fellings, so they told him to say sorry and all was forgiven. Nobody saw anything. Sammy, however, was not even there yesterday. He's innocent. Maybe he pulled her hair another day, and she's still holding a grudge? Maybe she made it up. We'll never know...

the countdown
The countdown to the c-section is currently 20 days. I am not going to update my ticker though, because that's not really when she's due, per se. The development stuff is still based on the first due date they gave me which is April 29th. And it's just too much trouble to change it to May 1st, which is my actual due date. It's close enough.

APRIL 25th here I come!

Perhaps starving the kid was a good idea
OH MY GOD!!! I can't believe it. You've got to see this! Okay, go look. I'll wait.
It's a video, so be patient and let it load.

la de da, la de da.

You back?

My daughter ate pizza last night. Almost a whole piece! I gave her a piece. She said she didn't like it. I turned it over so she could see the "bread" (crust) and she picked it up and ate it. Then she even ate the part with sauce on it. Almost a whole piece!!!

Conversations from the car
We talk a lot on the way home from day care. I try to ask her about her day. She sometimes tells me things that I wouldn't know otherwise and sometimes we talk about things I know she did. Yesterday, our conversation went something like this

A: Where are my guys? I don't see them?
M: I don't know honey, where are they?
A: At school.
A: Singing songs
A: by the door.
M: Yep, that's where they were when we left.
A: What's that Aden doing?
M: I don't know. What was he doing?
A: He hurt me.
M: He did? What did he do to you?
A: He hurt me.
M: Did he say he was sorry?
A: Yeah. He hurt my feelings
M: Did he push you?
A: nope
M: did he pull your hair?
A: nope.
A: Sammy did.
M: Sammy pulled your hair?
A: Yeah
M: Did he say he was sorry?
A: Yeah.
M: It's not nice to pull hair is it?
A: My guys hurt me.
M: They did?
A: 2 of them.
A: Sammy and Aden.
M: What did Aden do?
A: He threw a ball at me.
A: He said "Watch out"
M: Oh yeah? (giggling)
A: He hurt my feelings.
A: My 2 guys hurt my feelings.
M: well, that's probably going to happen again. You'll have to get used to it
A: Yeah
(I wonder how much of what she told me is true. She has a pretty vivid imagination sometimes)

A: How's a gonna find my Daddy?
M: He's home. We're going to go home right now and see him.
A: How many daddy's does Ally have?
M: Just 1 Daddy.
A: I have 6 grandmas.
M: yes. that's a lot
A: Yeah, and 6 grandpas too.
M: How many baby sisters do you have?
A: 1 IN. YOUR. BELLY.
M: that's right.
(She's gonig to be confused when the baby leaves my belly and comes into the world)

The fine line between...
...raspberries and spitting is lost on my daughter. Where exactly is that line anyway? It's really hard to see. I blew on her belly the other day, and she told me "You don't spit on me, Mom!" I told her I was blowing raspberries. She started spitting another time, and I told her not to. She told me she was blowing raspberries. I stopped her anyway. She was just spitting.

So I guess the line is all in the intent. It's just a matter of time before she starts telling me "It's not fair"